News – Fighting technology with technology: YouTube's new anti-cyberbulling channel allows teens to submit videos talking about their experiences fighting online bullies. Will efforts like these help curb cyberbullies and deter more teen suicides?
The worst I had it was in highschool when people would pose under fake screen names and taunt you or tease you about absurd things. I cannot imagine how bad it is now with social networking sites.
There's the rub though. One can argue over the means, whether it's in CyberSpace or RealSpace, but bullying is bullying no matter what. Sure it doesn't compare with physical bullying, but psychological bullying is just as worse.
I can recall one year where an entire school bullied me over one stupid mistake, which was actually insignificant if you look at it now, but it still hurt just the same.
It's easy saying, 'cut it off' but it also depends on the ones conducting the bullying themselves. Most cyberbullies don't stop with terrorizing their victims on the internet. If they know who you are, they can start making life in the real world equally as miserable.
Also for the record, suicidal thoughts aren't discriminating, they affect everyone in ways you can't imagine. Because when you're bullied--be you a child or a young adult--you do end up with low self-esteem, where depression sets in, and yes, people turn to suicide just to escape from their tormentors.
Not quite a rational decision, but many who do bully never realize the consequences of their actions, until it's too late. Or they're so apathetic about life in general, they don't care.
The real reason I believe the problem is overlooked is the fact, we've become so de-sensitized towards the concept. The truth is, reality is not a sitcom, nor a prefabricated script, and you're going to have bullies for most of your life. The thing here is, regrettably, thanks to the anonymity of the Internet, bullies have a new terrority for ruthlessly assaulting their victims.
Yes, it may not be like 'real' bullying, but it's just as bad since bullies realize here they can literally get away with murder since nobody knows their true identity. Whereas in the real world, one can eventually stand up to his/her physical bullies.
Just a thought here.
But you can stop them any time you wish. You have to turn a machine on, and read or listen to whatever it is these bullies do, so you are an accomplice in your own bullying. You often CANNOT prevent bullies from blacking an eye, loosening teeth, or breaking bones. In cyberspace everyone is equal. Not so on the playground or on the way home from school. The answer to it is all the same, though. Avoid it or take your bully on.
Sorry - I think you just don't get it.
It mat be a generational gap..
I'm hardly a teenager myself but I can perfectly understand the very REAL distress that a young person can experience - and sometimes that could even be from EITHER misunderstanding the AFFECT of what is being said or something that s/he said being either accidentally or deliberately distorted.
Its true its not sticks and stones stuff but these events can be excruciatingly painful to anyone, not just the wilting violets.
It SWHOULD be taken seriously. Whether its possible to legislate is much less clear.
You have hit the nail right on the head, gamahuche. I don't understand it. Nobody can actually damage you by what they say. The damage, in truth, is your own reaction to what people say. This is true regardless of whether they say it in person or by the phone or net, and the phone or net give you the very real advantage of NOT LISTENING. If you are going to bully me, PLEASE do it on the net! I've already had the broken nose from real bullying, and I am certain nobody can hurt me like that with words, whatever they may be. No words are ever on an equal level with physical violence, and words you can just delete are not nearly as bad as words you cannot control. This is also true whatever generation you may be in, and if you haven't learned it yet, then catch up with your elders!
True. But that's the problem right there. People usually will believe anything one person says and regrettably if they spread enough negativity about you, it can adversely affect you.
Ironically words themselves can't harm you, but the thoughts and intentions can, yes, you can ignore it and be the better person, but the truth is, nowadays people have started losing sensibility where they believe if something is in print, it's true regardless if they personally know the person or not.
As George Carlin once put it, "There are no bad words, bad thoughts, bad intentions, but no bad words." True no one's ever physically been harmed by words, phrases or epithets, however, for most those on the receiving end consider such negativity as if they had been punched in the face.
Now for the record, I've actually been bullied and physically attacked, so I'm aware of the difference between someone composing a 'poison pen' letter and a flesh-and-blood bully staring you in the face.
However the thing is, because of those differences, we've simply accepted the fact 'Cyberbullying' is like the 'New Kid Syndrome' where everyone wails on noobs, humiliating them, and subjecting them with physical and psychological torture for their sadistic pleasure.
Yes, you can hang up a phone, you can turn off a computer, you can even block someone on chat and ignore them. But ironically, you also end up not being able to enjoy going on the net, just like being chased away from your favourite hangout. Both essentially wrong in a sense. Because you should be permitted enjoying things in real life and in Cyberspace.
Now you said you'd prefer being bullied on the 'Net vs. Bullying in general because you can't get 'hurt' but there are OTHER forms of cyberbullying than just namecalling. Some Cyberbullies have become hackers where they can not only steal your identity, but extort money from you if they find out secret files on your computer.
Install Security programs, you say? Don't give out personal info, or store private items on your computer, you say? Easier than done. Once again, why should you make a prison for yourself and be miserable because some jerk out there is terrorizing you? Yes, they may not be in your face, giving you a makeshift facelift, breaking your legs and arms and tossing your remains in the river. But it's just as bad.
And the worst part of it is, because of this nonchalant, quick-fix attitude everyone's sporting, many bullies now do go to the Internet, due to fact they're aware they can get away with it.
Though I do grieve for the girl taking her life, personally, I honestly feel she really had no business on MySpace, considering most people there are young adults to the elderly and, of course, you're going to have bullies lurking about for fresh newbies to pick on. The thing is, though we can shut things down, block these guys, we're not really addressing the problem.
We're just concealing it so we longer have to worry about it, until it really starts getting out of hand.
And to the comment below. NOBODY wants to be bullied, no more than someone wants to be physically assaulted or have a car wreck. It happens whether we like it or not. Though we do have a right to ignore these beings, at the same time we have a right not to endure this as well.
Bottom line, folks. Most of these cyberbullies need to grow up, because if you can't say something directly to someone, then don't say it at all, and let us get on with our lives.
If you want to be miserable and lonely, then that's your hangup, not ours.
Perhaps we just need a definition of the term. You seem like a sensible person, mostly, so I can't see why you write things like this: "Yes, they may not be in your face, giving you a makeshift facelift, breaking your legs and arms and tossing your remains in the river. But it's just as bad." IT'S NOT! Multiple broken bones and murder are several levels more serious than bullying. As are identity theft and extortion, at least of anything more than your lunch money. In the end, I do know that the ones who can make a real impact on bullying are not parents, educators, and most especially not lawmakers. It's the kids themselves. When the bullying stops being cool and gets entirely negative responses from peers, it will mostly stop.
I think that we need to be exceedingly cautious about any laws that even edge close to the First Ammendment protection of free expression. And it may sound very callous, (cont)
It may sound very callous, but a few hurt feelings and a few broken bones, and yes, even a few deaths are not too big a price to pay to insure that the government does not infringe on our freedoms.
As for the viscious neighbor woman who terrorized a little girl until she committed suicide--If I lived in that neighborhood, I'd just burn her house down, and hope she was in it.
For the first response, I was being a bit sarcastic, because it amazes me in this day and age where one can dismiss rudeness and apathetic behaviour on the basis of how it's performed. Bullying under any form is wrong. Whether someone conveys it physically or psychologically, it shouldn't be viewed as 'acceptable' behaviour.
In all honestly, you point out the First Amendment. Ironically, what's interesting you are guaranteed the freedom of speech. Except if you encroach on someone else's freedom and that's where the dilemma comes in. Just as someone has a right to express themselves openly, others have a right to be treated fairly and with respect.
Regrettably this is not so in the real world. And you're right, the real source of bullying doesn't lie with the parents, educators and lawmakers, but the kids themselves. And the fact, we as humans, are an aggressive race and accept bullying as a component of childhood (cont.).
Yet, instead of just waiting for children 'outgrowing' this concept, we as adults, not as lawmakers, need to set better examples as well. Because most bullies, I've discovered from my own experiences learn to act this way from how they perceive this world.
For instance, the worst case of bullying I ever experienced was back in second grade when I accidentally hit a kid while playing tag with a new friend (hey, it was the 70s. What can I say?). I immediately wanted to help the kid up and apologize for my incident, but instead, every kid ganged up on me and wanted to hold me down and let the kid wail on me.
Naturally, I fought back in self-defense before the adults finally came and broke it up. Later the accidental 'victim' started learning judo and wanted to pick a fight with me.
So rather than do it on the playground, I said I would but in the morning inside the school just us. As expected the kid flipped me about several times, until after the fifth time (cont)
he started realizing I wasn't fighting back. Confused, he asked why, so I asked him, why did his buddies gang up on me when I originally wanted to apologize to him for my 'accident'. Key word being 'accident.' It then dawned on him whom the real bully was here, so he helped me up and got me to the nurse. Afterwards he called in all his buddies and brought them in front of the office, and then--a second-grader mind you--turned and said, "Why the HELL didn't you let this guy apologize? Why in the HELL did you gang up on him and ask me to beat him up?"
Dumbfounded, one replied. "Well, he's the new kid, THAT'S what you're supposed to do."
The truth here is, bullying breeds from ignornace and contempt for others. The fallacy you have to be rude, obnoxious, hateful and downright puglistic just so you can survive in the world is moronic.
Also I noticed you state what are a couple of deaths and broken limbs in order to protect our freedoms. (cont)
This argument doesn't wash because you're attempting comparing bullying to patriotism. Basically what our forefathers, grandfathers, and others did fighting in countless wars is NOTHING like being bullied for no apparent reason. Personally, it's easy to combat violence with more violence, then providing the justification you're 'protecting your freedoms and rights.'
But being a Texan myself, I've learned you literally gain nothing with this ideology. Except becoming a bigger bully yourself, than the bully you were battling. In the end, nobody wins.
In fact I noted where you denounced my remark as murder, except in the end of your comment you favoured arson as a means for dealing with the woman responsible for the child's suicide. Which proves my point altogether. If someone bully's you, bully them right back, regardless of the consequences.
The rub I have here is not as somuch the whole First Amendment being at stake. (cont)
But the essential fact unless someone ends up losing a life, or having their lives irreparably ruined beyond all recognition, the problem itself doesn't matter. Sweep it under the rug and let the next generation deal with it.
And you wonder why the 21st Century priorities are screwed up.
If you had bothered reading between the lines, you would've realized, you're really just splitting hairs over semantics. Basically stating unless someone is physically assaulted, it doesn't matter if a person is bullied online or not.
Bottom line here: I'm not saying I favour a realm devised by Orwell or Bradbury, where the government comes in and does all our thinking for us. Hell, no, I get that everyday at my job. I feel we as people had better start taking responsibility for our actions whether it's in the real world or an electronic one. Otherwise, we might as well throw away our laws and order and revert back to the Dark Ages.
But that's just me.
I never suggested apathy as a solution to any problem. I suggested that there is little that authorities can do about bullying, and that children more or less need to police themselves, and you supported my argument with your story. You suggested that people have the right to respect and fairness. Well, it would be a cool thing if they did, but they most emphatically do not. And our government has no responsibility in this matter except that the government treat its citizens equally under the law. If you want to tease me and call me bad names it is none of the government's business, and I am free to treat you the same way. What I would like to be is certainly a more pleasant person than that, and a better example to others, but that is only my requirement for myself.
As to adults who terrorize children in any way, they are my enemies, and burning their houses down is very calm and civilized compared to hacking them into small pieces with a machete, which is what I would prefer to do.
this is not bullying. It is complete rejection of them and expulsion of them from my presence by death if necessary. Such persons deserve no more consideration than termites, rats, flies or other vermin.
http://www.ncgolfers.com/nc-golf-packages/
http://www.ncgolfers.com/north-carolina/tee-tim...
http://www.ncgolfers.com/north-carolina/golf-ha...
http://www.ncgolfers.com/north-carolina-golf/
http://www.ncgolfers.com/nc-golf-courses/
http://www.ncgolfers.com/nc-golf-communities/
http://www.ncgolfers.com/north-carolina/golf-sp...
http://www.ncgolfers.com/north-carolina-golf-to...
To tkyrchncs:
First off, I would never stoop to mudraking because you're the first person in Propeller who's given me a serious debate on a topic.
And it's understandable on how you feel about adults acting like bullies as well as terrorizing kids. In fact, working in retail sometimes I envision scenarios making the Marquis De Saad and Morticia Addams proud, when I have customers who dare threaten me or other customers.
Also you're right about it not being the government's business on how we treat others. I guess what's getting in my craw while we've been taught to respect others how we ourselves would like to be treated, you'll always have those who ruthlessly torment others just for the sheer pleasure of it.
Regardless of the consequences.
To Ghengiskhan: Dude, first off, nobody ALLOWS themselves to be bullied, it happens. Because first off, we perceive things individually.
For instance, I can actually offend you without resorting using vulgarities. Say I sent you a message on a loop stating "I want your babies." How you interpret this is up to you. You can either determine it as bullying, or just some demented freak with far too much time on their hands.
Not dissimilar to bullying in real life, nobody inquires or requests for one to be psychologically and physically terrorized, it happens, and as tkyrchncs indicated, there's very little anyone can do about it, because regrettably it's encoded in our nature. We are a violent race. Even long before the media and electronic devices have come into play.
The dilemma here is we consider bullying as a component of childhood and schoolyard drama. In the media, whenever they show films, books, magazines, what have you, there's ALWAYS a bully. And believe it or not, there's a game based on bullying.
We do glamorize bullying to a degree where we now consider it acceptable.
So in a way, one must wonder how far do we allow this before it gets too far out of hand? Perhaps we are overreacting, perhaps the parents should've monitored their daughter better, who knows?
Nobody. You see, here's the thing, if the object bullying you was a prefabricated being composed of electronic instructions, yes, you could easily switch it off. Regrettably, these are people who have far too much time on their hands, and can't find anything better to do than terrorize strangers. Yes, we can switch it off, yes, we can ignore them. But what about the next victim who just wants nothing more than enjoying their online excursions?
To Acer454: Ah, the classic, stay out of the offending areas argument. The reason it doesn't serve as a practical solution is this: if you keep avoiding the places for fear of conflict, then you end up avoiding life altogether. You might as well be a hermit. Which is ridiculous indeed.
Because as tkyrchns as indicated: you're going to have bullies anyplace, anywhere, anytime. Unfortunately you have to start learning to either stand up to them eventually, or being running a coward for the rest of your life.
Now in all truthfulness, I personally feel the child was far too young in having a MySpace account. Mainly that's just me, because I know there are others who would debate this matter. And at the same time the woman inadverently responsible should've known FAR much better than exemplifying her behaviour. However, what's sad in this case is, the woman responsible will probably get away with it because the courts will probably decide the child was a minor and the parents will be punished for allowing her unsupervised on the Internet.
Another reason why I do agree with tky's viewpoint on not letting the government get involved. In my own perspective, I feel we need to take responsibility for what we do. Whether it's in the real or electronic world.
http://astore.amazon.co.uk/angelcare-baby-monit...
http://astore.amazon.co.uk/philips-sonicare-too...
http://astore.amazon.co.uk/philishave-coolskin-21
http://astore.amazon.co.uk/mens-electric-shaver...
http://astore.amazon.co.uk/braun-electric-tooth...
http://astore.amazon.co.uk/phillips-televisions-21
saying that you'd prefer being bullied on Internet vs. Bullying in general ... well, there are other forms of cyberbullying than just namecalling, dont you think so? Russian recently discussed a proposed bill on this matter (see newsclips here at http://partkom.com/category/space/ ), and there was quite a buzz...
Not a member? Sign-up today!
rontravel
inonoysotile
iacupuncture
inatural
iarthritis
frenmorow
AnnaPeres
IZasPIE
MaryP.Murphy
ElizabethL.Cloutier
RichardD.Phelan
AmandaN.Tarbox
RichardP.Nathanson
JacobK.Whitlow
MelissaF.Hess
GaryA.Stevenson
WendyA.Haley
ChristinaB.Dowden
JoshuaL.Peters
JudithB.Mannion
JoyceW.Frank
angelitobcn
Lappu
doitez
NewsLine
DianCor
_kam0_
BJTJ
avpd85
dandt1612
Fangarius
helenephoto
KLopez
agentX
ascomputer
pagey
MidnightPrism
postitive
GHOSTWHOWALKS
Aidenag
codelion
STONERS
hsaleem
Ciera Marie
Macas
berkeley
UndergroundAttraction
capn_caveman
shead
bugluver
About Propeller | Frequently Asked Questions | Help
© 2003-2008 Propeller. All Rights Reserved. Terms of Use | Privacy Policy
33)
Vote
Aw, jeez, guys, it's an electronic communications device! Cut it off! This stuff in no way compares to real bullying where the victim is humiliated and/or injured in person. Nobody has to submit to it because they are small or weak or timid. Just block the bully, don't answer, CUT IT OFF! I know it hurts most emotionally to be bullied, because I was bullied in the flesh, and I also feared for my life at times. I feel for these kids, but if bullying of any kind makes you suicidal, then you are not yet mature enough to deal with the situation alone, and this includes chatting via computer or phone.
We're just concealing it so we longer have to worry about it, until it really starts getting out of hand.
http://fast-diets.net
http://ensureinsurance.net
http://webhostingdomainnames.net
http://whatismoney.net